A Spalding dad who opened up about losing his fiancée to cancer on TikTok – has shared how social media helped him to cope

Less than a year ago, Brett Harman, 36, faced unimaginable heartbreak when his fiancée, Hannah, died just 18 days before her 30th birthday.

A few weeks later, searching for comfort in the unbearable silence of his home, Brett turned to TikTok, not to go viral, but to find connection.

What began as a way to cope has since grown into a successful content creation journey, amassing nearly 280,000 followers and launching his own podcast.

Brett Harman with his late wife and young daughter.

placeholder image — Brett Harman with his late wife and young daughter.

Losing Hannah taught Brett life is too short and you must follow your dreams, and his mission is now to create a positive social media escape for others.

Brett and Hannah’s story began back in 2013, when they met working at Domino’s Pizza. Brett was fresh out of university, about to start his teaching career, and Hannah was studying nursing.

“We were young, ambitious and in love,” said Brett. “We moved in together and started to build a life, even through the tough times.”

But in 2015, Brett was diagnosed with leukaemia at just 26.

Brett Harman pictured with his fiancée Hannah, who sadly lost her battle with cancer aged just 29.

“One day I was teaching, the next I was fighting for my life. It took two years of treatment. Hannah helped me through every minute of it, all while finishing her degree.”

Even during chemotherapy, Brett returned to teaching because his sick pay had run out. Meanwhile Hannah qualified as a nurse, specialising in elderly care, later going to work on the frontlines during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Their relationship grew stronger. They got engaged in Las Vegas in 2018 and were planning for a family when tragedy struck again.

In 2021, halfway through Hannah’s pregnancy, she noticed a lump on her leg.

Brett Harman says TikTok and social media has helped him to cope with the grief.

“At first, we didn’t think it was serious, but it grew to the size of a rugby ball,” explained Brett. “The diagnosis was rare and brutal, BCOR sarcoma, and Hannah began chemotherapy immediately, even while still pregnant.

"We were terrified, and she found losing her hair particularly tough, but she remained unbelievably strong. Our daughter Summer was born two months early in December 2021, at just seven months gestation.

"Despite everything, Summer was healthy, and it looked like Hannah might beat the cancer. She finished chemo, had radiotherapy, multiple surgeries, and by 2022, we were told the cancer was gone. We believed we’d made it through.”

Brett and Hannah began planning their wedding. But in the summer of 2024, just a week after they’d been visiting potential wedding venues, everything changed again. Hannah began suffering crippling abdominal pains, and after multiple tests, the devastating news came, the cancer had returned, this time in her abdomen, and it was incurable.

“Hannah didn’t want to hear it. She said we’d beat it. She did double strength chemo without hesitation, but it tore her body apart. Her liver, her bladder, everything started shutting down.”

In October 2024, Hannah was put on a ventilator. She had contracted RSV, and her weakened immune system couldn’t fight it.

“I was praying for numbers on the machines to go up,” said Brett. “They didn’t. We were told to prepare for the worse. Hannah passed away on 31st October 2024, just 18 days before her 30th birthday.”

This left Brett to raise their then two-year-old daughter Summer alone.

“It was terrifying, suddenly raising Summer on my own. Hannah was such a devoted mum, and I didn’t feel like I knew how to do everything. But I had to learn, I YouTubed how to do a plait. I just wanted to be there for Summer.

“The weeks after Hannah died were really tough. I’d get Summer to bed, and then the house would go completely silent. I’d sit in that silence, just staring at the walls. That’s when I started going on TikTok Live, just for a bit of company. That’s where it all began.”

To Brett’s surprise, people connected with him. His energy, humour and insight resonated online. Leaning into what he loved – movies, gaming, pop culture and quizzes – Brett created Brettflix, a social media channel, which, just nine months later, is now followed by 225,000 people across TikTok and Instagram.

Now, with the launch of The Brettflix Podcast, Brett is building something even bigger.

“I lost the love of my life,” he said. “I lost the future we dreamed of. But what I didn’t lose was my voice. I realised, if I’m still here, if I’ve survived cancer and now this, I have to use it.”

While Brett’s story is full of heartbreak, Brettflix is intentionally joyful.

“The content isn’t about cancer or grief. It’s about what helped me cope. Fun, films, nostalgia, community, distraction, escape. I’m not healed, but I’m healing. Every post, every laugh, every piece of social media content or podcast episode is a step forward. I want to help others take that step too.

"Life is unpredictable, but so is love, humour, courage and connection. I’m not a motivational speaker, I’m just a bloke from Lincolnshire who had his world ripped apart. But if I can help someone else feel less alone, then that’s everything.”

You can follow Brettflix on TikTok via @Brett_Harman and Instagram via @Brettflix_Official. Listen to The Brettflix Podcast on all major podcast platforms.