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Alan Swann: on women's sport and discipline in rugby
SOUTH Africa's rugby team are a bunch of eye-gouging, late-tackling, dirty thugs and the sport should be ashamed that such an unruly mob can call themselves world champions.
SOUTH Africa's rugby team are a bunch of eye-gouging, late-tackling, dirty thugs and the sport should be ashamed that such an unruly mob can call themselves world champions.Make no mistake the British Lions were robbed of a deserved victory in Pretoria by a team of hooligans backed all the way by the latest in a long line of pathetic one-eyed referees who are supposed to police the game.
At kick-off I wondered what a guy who looked like the hopeless policeman from 'Allo 'Allo was doing with the whistle. It took me, and the rest of the world apart from the myopic South African coach, less than two minutes to realise that this Frenchman was also into appeasement.
Eye-gouging is supposed to warrant an instant red card and a six-month ban. Indeed the Lions lost a key player before this tour had even started to the same offence.
But different rules apply in the Southern Hemisphere so the disgusting Schalk Burger was instead 'punished' by 10 minutes in the sin bin.
This shouldn't have come as any surprise given the apparent legitimacy of spear-tackling on the previous Lions tour. It was also no shock to see a controversial late try awarded to the home side even though the touch judge was five metres away and clearly had doubts.
That touch judge just happened to be the New Zealander who had penalised the Lions heavily in the first Test. The video referee just happened to be the Australian who managed to spot an English toe-nail in touch to deny them a try in the last World Cup Final.
The Lions were unjustly treated, but even after the match they showed far more intelligence than the home side. Coach Ian McGeechan was incredibly restrained in his post-match interview – it's doubtful any of his football counterparts would have managed to hold back their disgust at an obvious injustice.
But South Africa's captain predictably insisted he was proud of his players and presumably he even included Burger. South Africa's coach even defied all logic by insisting Burger did little wrong.
What a pair of classless clowns.
THE only good thing to emerge from Pretoria was the hope that rugby lovers will now stop lecturing us football fans about the superior discipline of their players.
Footballers receive red cards for far less serious offences than rugby players get away with. The availability of the sin bins offers rugby referees the opportunity to look tough when in fact they are just bottling a big decision that might upset a big crowd.
Similarly this citing business is just a cop-out. Burger has now picked up a ban which won't hurt his team or the player at all when in reality the Lions should have played 78 minutes against 14 rather than 15 louts.
Increasingly the outcome of rugby union at the highest level is being determined by the referee's interpretation of laws that I suspect half the players don't understand.
I HAVE seen nothing at Wimbledon or in the latest Twenty/20 international or in the entire history of ladies football, to make me change my mind about women's sport.
I wouldn't pay a single penny to see a single event and nothing that the angry PC brigade, many of whom took the time to write to me last week, have said has persuaded me otherwise.
I suspect many of the men who do watch the tennis are as interested in legs and torsos as they are in serve and volley. And who can blame them when four of the anonymous, but very attractive, top lady seeds posed provocatively on a beach in the run-up to Wimbledon.
Women can't flaunt their wares in an attempt to sell tickets and then moan that their skills, such as they are, aren't taken seriously by the educated sporting pundit.
AND there isn't a player in the England Ladies cricket team who would get into Peterborough Town's side on ability.
The bowlers would all be cannon fodder for any half decent male batsman (I even reckon I could whack them about and I've been retired three years).
And as for the contributor below who reckons that England and Arsenal Ladies would beat Posh at football words almost fail me.
Netherton United would be too powerful, too fast and far too skillful for England. Goalkeeping and aerial ability is non-existent in the ladies' game for a start.
If the teams were matched up I'd go 6-0 Netherton, but 12-0 if they stayed off the beer the night before.
NEXT PAGE: Swanny's fanmailWhat a ridiculous article regarding women in sport.
The England Ladies (captained by local girl Charlotte Edwards) have just won the World Twenty/20, while the male side was well beaten by the Netherlands.
In your haste to denigrate the performance of females you also seem to forget that women are consistently successful in equestrian sport, swimming, shooting and many other disciplines.
In equestrian spheres they not only compete on equal terms with the male competitors but very often beat them.
These attitudes belong in the dark ages.
Muddy Fox
I encourage and support my daughters, who do hockey and athletics to regional standard, and watch them play all the time.
I back them emotionally and financially and it is my pleasure as a loving father to do so.
They are fantastic. Nothing would make me happier or prouder than to see them represent their country in 2012.
Women have a right to enjoy and improve at any sport they wish.
Just don't kid us that the national teams at cricket and football deserve equal recognition to their male counterparts.
Parvenu
Fenland
Once you get past the pretty girls, I find women's tennis incredibly dull compared to the excitement the men's game generates and that's the same with the majority of sports.
I'm not for one moment suggesting women shouldn't be playing sports, I'd just rather not watch.
I'd be gutted if I got tickets to centre court and found the majority of the tennis would be provided by grunting women.
Poshfan
I only started reading Alan Swann's column last week and have decided that he is not a sports fan as I have yet seen anything positive written.
Leave the ranting to the tabloids and get out of the office and go and 'investigate' some of the fantastic achievements in and around Peterborough.
StopTheWorld
Alan, please be quiet and stop spouting rubbish.
That sort of thing is funny when coming out of the mouth of someone like DCI Gene Hunt, but you're not in the same league.
Miffy001
I saw the women's World Twenty/20 final and it was a shockingly poor standard.
Rubbish bowling, worse batting and dismal fielding. You could see better on most village greens at the weekend.
Sir Digby Chicken Caesar
Swanny had balls when he printed Barry Fry's contract and he has balls when saying stuff most people think, but are too scored of being politically incorrect.
He's absolutely spot on about women's sport. Most of it is unwatchable unless your interest is more shallow than the actual sport.
Danny Boyle
Sexist twit
NDS2008
England Ladies would easily beat Posh and Arsenal Ladies would also give them a run for their money.
People should only comment when they have experience on the subject.
Steve Purnell
Peterborough
Who cares what Alan Swann writes? I would only find this drivel offensive if he was someone whose opinion I valued.
I recall Swanny as a slothful youth devoid of any talent with bat, stick or ball – certainly not worth watching.
And now in 'adulthood', similarly lacking any talent with words or opinion, so not worth reading.
Chickenteeth
Equal pay for men and women at Wimbledon is the biggest joke in sport.
Trevor 112
That stuff about women in sport is Swanny at his best. You are currently on fire sir and I salute you
Donut
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