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French on Friday: What a weekend!
POOR old Chris Beeby had one of those weekends you like to forget in a hurry.
The Thoney Rugby Club stalwart is intelligent (or at least I thought so) and has a good job which involves a lot of driving.
So, when he set out to go to Hull, how on earth did he manage to end up on the other side of the country in Manchester? He came up with some lame excuse about being given the wrong postcode that he entered into his satnav.
Not a good day then .. . and it got worse. Her indoors demanded that Chris fetch a takeaway for supper so what he did do? He fell asleep . . . and by the time he woke up they were all shut.
And then the going really got tough the next day when his punishment was to take five little girls swimming!
But at least the weekend from hell ended on a high note when he beat arch rival Mark ‘Happy’ Harris by one shot on the golf course.
Shaun’s lip-service
NOW this isn’t something you’d expect a grown man to do . . .
But then again Shaun ‘Pikey’ Throne, Peterborough Rugby Club’s kit man, isn’t like most grown men.
He has a job mending vending machines so when he was called out to one that wouldn’t produce hot water he knew instantly what was wrong. There was a blockage, he deduced.
Very clever. Not so clever was what he did next. He got hold of the plastic tube that was blocked and sucked hard.
Whoops! Not a good idea. The next thing he knew he had a moutful of boiling hot water and was in some distress. A kind companion quickly smacked a load of ice cubes around his mouth and they stuck to his lips.
For several days ‘Pikey’ was nowhere near as lippy as usual.
Is he a well man?
NEWBOROUGH nincompoop Brian Joyce just can’t stop blundering his way through life.
The old cricketer got all dressed up on Monday - collar and tie, freshly pressed trousers, the lot - even clean underpants. The occasion? He was off to see his doctor for an MOT or, to give it the proper name, a Well Man Clinic appoinment.
He arrived bang on time - shame it just happened to be the wrong day and the wrong week!
So he’s failed the memory test already then!
What an old windbag!
HERE’S a very good reason why old men shouldn’t be using Facebook.
This was spotted on former Borough Rugby Club star Kev Roe’s Facebook page at the weekend.
‘Is up already. No sleep. Wind kept me awake. Off to London to see Abi for lunch. Probably sleep in car on way home.’
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Weather for Peterborough
Saturday 26 May 2012
Today
Sunny
Temperature: 11 C to 23 C
Wind Speed: 18 mph
Wind direction: East
Tomorrow
Sunny
Temperature: 11 C to 23 C
Wind Speed: 16 mph
Wind direction: East
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