The kind of last goodbye that we envisage when we get married is... well, death I suppose, if you take the vows of 'til death us do part literally (and I'm not sure too many people do these days).

In most people's minds, their vision of a romantic final farewell is one that is played out on the platform of a railway station like a scene from the movie Brief Encounter.

In this scene you are both fighting back the tears in mid-passionate clutch on the platform as you make some perplexing, but vaguely romantic sounding statement, like: "I'm sorry it did not work out baby. But in another life and another time and place it could have been so different. Til then I'll wait for you forever."

But this is the noughties and not the '40s, and as those words leave your lips the PA will sound up and the station manager will ruin your last goodbye with the muffled and incomprehensible announcement that your ex-partner's train is an estimated 45 minutes late due to no particular reason. At this point your realise you've only put enough money in the parking ticket machine for another 10 minutes.

"So just a moment ago you said you would wait for me forever in another life, but now you can't wait any longer because of your ticket. You always knew how to kill a romantic moment."

And that effectively sums up divorce – the parking ticket has expired on your marriage, and it is time to move your vehicle elsewhere.

The final dramatic words you utter when you part from a long-term relationship should be ones that have a resonance, a significance that encapsulates all that has gone before.

It's important you say the right things. It may be worth rehearsing your last lines for this life-changing moment.

There are certain words and phrases that are inappropriate for a last goodbye.

Avoid a casual "cheerio" because it's too flippant, "ciao" because it's naff and "toodle pip" on the grounds that it's just plain weird.

"Yo, keep it real," is too chavvy and "I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you," is too sarcastic.

My advice is to keep it simple. I would suggest something such as "take care of yourself" or maybe "have a good life". However, the latter phrase can sound a little like you're secretly hoping they will have a crap life and contract some nasty flesh-eating face-withering disease (which you may well be hoping actually happens, given that this is a break-up).